Sad News

Don't worry. Although I seem to have hit a rut with my weight loss plan, weighing in at 297, everything is still going well. Frankly, I'm not that concerned because my body fat percentage is down a little and my hydration level is up a little, indicating a slight increase in muscle. This is good. I have been lax about drinking my water and I can feel a difference in my body because of it. I've started fresh this week and have so far been back on track. I went walking with friends on Saturday and had a really nice time. I enjoyed both the company and the change in scenery, if not the cold wind. We talked about making it a regular thing and I really hope we do. I went to the gym this morning intending to work out for an hour, but I cut it down to half because I was tired and my legs still hurt a little from all the hills I conquered over the weekend.

In the end I'm glad I did cut my workout short, because just after I left the gym my father called to tell me my grandfather had died in his sleep last night. I don't take my phone with me to the gym, so had I worked out the full hour I would have missed his call and honestly, that's a horrible voicemail to get. Not to mention I likely wouldn't have gone back to the gym for a while. I strongly associate location to emotion. Now I need to concentrate on making myself eat at least a little. I tend to starve myself, albeit unintentionally, when I grieve.

In fact I tried something new this morning. I got some shad at the fish market, which was full of roe. Shad roe is apparently a delicacy, so when the man at the market asked me did I want to keep it I said yes, please. I actually forgot about it until the middle of last night (I put it in a drawer in my fridge and for me out of sight is truly out of mind), so it needed to be cooked. This morning I basically poached it in butter, oven baked it, and served it over rice. It was interesting, but honestly after the bad news it could have been the most fantastic meal in the world and I wouldn't have noticed. My first impression was that it was kind of like salty meat grits. I made myself eat half and saved the other half for when I'm in a better state of mind to really taste it.